Future Update

May 14, 2028 – Robotic soldiers deployed in Iraq are exhibiting an increasing number of microprocessor problems and other hardware maladies as they are put back on the front again and again, FU has learned.

Halliburton, which has been overseeing the war effort in Iraq for the last seven years, is now forking out billions to compensate combat robots suffering from such malfunctions as post-traumatic hardware impairment.  The fighting in Iraq, now in its 25th year, is believed to be overloading the robots’ circuitry.  

Among cyber troops sent to Iraq for the third or fourth time, more than one in four show signs of malfunctioning Flash-ROM circuits, damaged RAM chips and bent voice coil actuators, according to confidential company documents obtained by FU.  Some of the units are beyond repair, the documents state.

Halliburton began deploying the robotic troops in 2025 to help reduce the costs of compensating human veterans for combat-related physical and psychological injuries.   But the plan has backfired. The military and intelligence corporation said it expects to spend $120 billion a year to fix up damaged army and marine robot models.  That’s more than double the $59 billion a year that the U.S. government was spending to compensate human military veterans before Halliburton bought out the departments of Defense and Veteran Affairs in 2021.

Despite the escalating costs, Halliburton chief executive W.R. Monger insists he is not ready to endorse any troop drawdowns, and will resort to hiring new human soldiers to make up for any problems with robot supplies.

But the watchdog group Citizens Against Human Waste have denounced that plan, saying the use of robotic soldiers is far more cost-effective than human troop deployments.

“God forbid we go back to the days when a bunch of whiney enlistees go into combat and then expect handouts for the rest of their lives because they got a little scared or hurt, ” said CAHW President Noah Spender. “With robots, all you need to do is reformat their hard drives, and they can go right back to the front. You don’t have to worry about them feigning post-traumatic stress disorder.”