February 23, 2029 — Keanu Reeves won his first Academy Award last night for his performance as a statue in the arthouse film Museum Piece.“Whoa, thank you” Reeves said as his acceptance speech.
The star of such classics as Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure and Point Break, Reeves was hailed for his portrayal of a stone statue stolen from the Louvre by a band of highly skilled thieves.
“Reeves showed his true prowess in remaining devoid of any emotional depth or facial expression,” wrote film critic Richard Roeper in a December review.
Museum Piece also won the Oscar for Best Picture.
Tara Reid won the Best Actress Oscar for her portrayal of socialite and plastic-surgery addict Jocelyn Wildenstein in Lion Queen.
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Great post. That Tara Reid pic is going to give me nightmares.
Obviously there was a mix up of pics. This is no pic of Tara Reid than of Jocelyn Wildenstein – a victim of plastic surgery. Horror!
This WILL happen!
I’d put money on it.
Not surprised the country is stuck in the S-bend. If you cannot appreciate the subtlety Keanu brings to many of his roles, it would be best if you could keep silent. Your attempt at humor serves only to display your lack of sensitivity. Keanu will always be way ahead of his detractors and small-minded critics. Get used to being what you are — a nobody among nonentities..
Thank-you, Christopher Coleman: well said
That was hilarious! Well done! I really enjoyed the fact that you appreciate that Keanu has no depth in the characters he plays. He’s another one of those actors that just plays themselves, but with different lines than what they have in real life. Please, keep vocalising your fresh, non-sheep opinions. Do not be silent, like that fascist Christopher Coleman is asking you to be. Sensitivity is for pussies. You spit the truth in a way that can be appreciated by all – and humour is a powerful medium for truth. Your criticisms are outside the square, and actually not small-minded at all. Unfortunately for you, non-entities like that Coleman faggot will always exist, and worse, these cretins make up a majority of the population of the world.