FCC Cracks Down on Holographic Cartoons

This is the last story in a three-part series on the dangers of advanced television technology. In this final installment, we report on children who are injured, both physically and psychologically, while watching holographic cartoons.

by Skip DeKades

March 6, 2029 — Two-year-old Lu Nee Tyun fell and broke her nose while chasing the Road Runner with Wile E. Coyote.

Richie Grayson, 5, tried to help Batman punch out the Joker, and threw his fist into a plaster wall, breaking two bones in his hand.

These are among dozens of injuries reported to the Federal Communications Commission in the two years since the Holographic Online Toons (HOT) network went live on Web TV.  

HOT streams a mix of vintage and contemporary cartoons in holographic format, allowing the characters to seemingly emerge from the screen and interact with young viewers. The programming lineup includes classics like The Flintstones and Tom and Jerry and new series such as Batman: The Lame and the Old and Reservoir Dogs: The Animated Series.

But reports show that many toddlers are unable to distinguish holograms from reality, and become too interactive with the cartoon characters.   

“My pre-schooler Ida tried to take a spin in Fred Flintstone’s car,” said Dean Kneau, a 43-year-father of three in Pittsburgh. “She ended up with second-degree burns on the soles of her feet.”

     

HOT programming can cause psychological problems as well, the evidence shows. Many children become traumatized when monsters or super villains emerge from the TV screen. Often, the youngsters don’t understand that the holograms are simply digital images, and not real.

“My son Jacob is scared of a certain monster on Scooby Doo that happens to resemble my Uncle Henry,” said Mona N. Whyne, 34, of Modesto, Calif.  “Now, whenever Uncle Henry comes over, Jacob screams and begs me to turn off the TV — even when the TV isn’t turned on.”

The FCC is considering rules that would require hologram-capable TVs to come equipped with an H-Chip, a device that parents can activate to prevent TVs from emitting holographic images of certain TV shows.

“People deserve the ability to keep certain cartoon characters out of their homes,” said FCC Chairman Will Sensur.  “I certainly wouldn’t want Pepé Le Pew stinking up my house, and I don’t want Josie and the Pussycats making a racket in my living room.”

Luckily, the FCC doesn’t know about Humorbloggers.com.