January 28, 2030—Applesoft yesterday introduced the iPotty, a new portable entertainment device that plays music, video and surfs the Web, and also folds out into a porta potty.
Steve Jobs 3.0, the second clone of the late Apple founder Steve Jobs, unveiled the device at a special press event in San Francisco. The tablet-like device possesses many of the same features and functions of past Applesoft devices, including the iPad, the iPhone, the iPod and the iPistol. But its casing folds out into four walls and a commode that contains a powerful drill for boring holes in the ground—even concrete. This allows users to relieve themselves anytime, anywhere.
“What’s more, the screen stays open on one wall of the porta john, so users can continue to watch their videos or surf the Web while they’re taking care of business,” Jobs 3.0 said.
The introduction of the iPotty has been rumored for weeks, and has been the most highly anticipated device from the company since it acquired Microsoft in 2018. The iPotty will retail for $2,099. New AT&T will be the exclusive distributor, which has many consumers upset. AT&T is also the exclusive dealer for Applesoft’s last major release, the iPen, and many consumers have blamed the carrier for the device’s sluggish ink flow.
What a great product, especially handy when ice fishing or tailgating.
Or caught in a traffic jam, while waiting to be scanned at an airport, in que for foodstamps–there’s not end to its appeal.
That’s great. So basically, people can just take a dump freely into their iPotty without having to resort to posting on their blog. I love how everything is made easier in the future.
Haha I wanna order one now! (: