April 17, 2029—Conservative commentator Sean Hannity, who is considered one of the world’s most notorious disinformation terrorists, is in federal custody after federal agents caught him trying to set off a bullshit bomb on the Internet.
Federal agents on Thursday arrested Hannity at his hideout in a lower Manhattan apartment building after receiving an anonymous tip about his plans to carry out the terrorist plot. Hannity, 67, is the host-in-hiding of a talk show on Fox News.com, which the Department of Homeland Security has declared to be a domestic terrorist organization.
It was the most prominent arrest yet in the federal government’s effort to crack down on far-right rhetorical terrorism, which has victimized millions of Americans over the last 20 years with distortions and vile. The group recruits disciples and incites unrest by misleading people into believing its news is “fair and balanced.”
Hannity has been on the FBI’s most-wanted list since 2014, when he convinced his audience that then-President Barack Obama worshipped Satan. That remark violated the Stop Hyberbole, Untruths, Defamation, and Ultra-Pomposity (SHUT-UP) Act passed by Congress in 2013. Hannity has been in hiding but still streaming his show over the Internet ever since.
In Washington today, the White House issued a statement praising the FBI for capturing Hannity.
“We have finally caught this bastard and can now shut him up,” said White House press secretary Holly Wood. “He is the kingpin of Fox News.com, and by apprehending him we are one step closer to finding and arresting the ultimate mastermind behind the network - Roger Ailes.”
Hannity is believed to be one of the key forces behind a rise in fascist demogogary that began during the Obama administration—when Fox sponsored repeated anti-tax “tea parties” across the country. His apprehension is considered the biggest strike against Fox News since FBI agents in 2026 charged commentator Bill O’Reilly with criminal dogmatism. A federal court in February sentenced O’Reilly to 10 years of hard labor serving as a butler to MSNBC commentator Keith Olbermann.